Twenty Questions on the Sorrowfell Plains

Barking Alien's campaign tour is a little more deep in the weeds than I tend to get on world-building, but it's still good to review the state of the campaign setting every once in a while. Almost fifteen years ago, I did Jeff Rients' twenty questions regarding the Sorrowfell Plains. As often happens, information blooms, changes, and evolves over expanded timeframes, so those questions now have different (and hopefully more precise) answers.

1. What is the deal with my cleric's religion?

It's the standard Renn Faire, D&D-style polytheism nonsense. There's a whole pantheon of gods great and small, but people traditionally choose a patron deity (or two) and worship them like household spirits or patron saints. (Although plenty of folks venerate the whole pantheon, as needed.) Individual temples aren't typically networked into organized religions, but they're also not not networked; a cleric of Ioun can pray at any temple of Ioun without risk of defying tradition. That having been said, if a church has a seat of power, it's probably in Scandshar; a pilgrimage is likely in order if you have the time and money.

2. Where can we go to buy standard equipment?

There's bound to be at least one general store in your average city or town. Villages are a little more dicey, and might only have supplies if a merchant caravan passes through. (Or if Old Harold is willing to part with his grandfather's breastplate.) There are some trading posts in the borderlands, but it's best to stock up before your next expedition.

3. Where can we go to get platemail custom fitted for this monster I just befriended?

Scandshar, the major city in the region, is still your best bet. Grimwald, far to the northwest, mostly comprises what hardliners still sometimes call "monstrous humanoids" and so has many armorsmiths who cater to inhuman body plans.

4. Who is the mightiest wizard in the land?

A surprisingly difficult question. Historically, the answer is Archmagus Iandak Voiddrake, Supplicant of the Quaint and Curious Spheres, but he has been unseen so long that it is no longer even clear if he's alive. (Of course, he held so many secrets and so many magical contingencies that it seems unlikely that he's actually dead.) Ebenezer Cascata Mararnith Jepson, headmaster of the University of the Study of the Arcane Arts and Sciences in Duchy Jepson, is the "safe" answer.

Of course, Baron Adeptus Bezaldooz of the adventuring company known as the Shields of the Sorrowfell might have surpassed the Headmaster and the old Archmagus. And nobody is entirely certain what to make of recently-seen planar travelers like Barnabus Sleet or Pete Loudly.

5. Who is the greatest warrior in the land?

Also a difficult question. The best answer, assuming he's a real person and not just a legend, is probably Swordsaint Rishi, an immortal devotee of the god Kord who is alleged to be such a skilled swordsman that he is capable of fighting Death itself such that it either cannot or will not claim him. (If the tales are true, he's been alive for millennia.) The gladiator Thalia the Bloody-Handed is perhaps better known, although with the uncertain future of the gladiator matches in Scandshar, who knows what that means? Although she is not as well known as the other two listed people, the fey noblewoman Lady Graunwen Dwin'altin is also an incredibly formidable warrior.

Of course, Baron Sergeant-at-Arms Peren and Baron Sergeant-at-Arms Torinn, both of the Shields of the Sorrowfell, might be more accurate choices. Some also claim that recently-seen planar traveler Malice A'forethought fits the bill. Still others wonder at the bloody swathe carved by the escaped gladiators of the Scandshar Six, especially Nobody or Southie.

6. Who is the richest person in the land?

Until recently, the answer was probably one of the lords of the crime syndicate known as the Illustrious Menagerie of Peacocks — most likely Lady Victoria Loveless MacBeth, also known as Lord Key. However, with the collapse of their operations and the death of their leadership, the answer is probably someone with access to government treasuries: Duchess Sophia Taika Jepson, Governor Svetlana Zupan, or similar. It could also be a merchant or a noble whose intrigues lead them to avoid disclosing their true wealth.

Of course, groups like the Shields of the Sorrowfell and Those Who Remember have been pulling treasure out of the depths of the earth, so it's possible the actual answer is one of those nouveau riche adventuring companies.

7. Where can we go to get some magical healing? 

Several villages have a faithful priest or a village witch who can aid you, but if you want The Good Stuff™, a major temple in a city or town is your best bet. Expect to "donate" or pay, of course.

8. Where can we go to get cures for the following conditions: poison, disease, curse, level drain, lycanthropy, polymorph, alignment change, death, undeath?

As above. Some of those are easier to heal than others, so the village witch might be able to help you with a minor poisoning, while you might need a priest of great faith in a major population center to heal some curses. Some of these things are beyond the ken of most established religions, even in major population centers like Scandshar.

There is a recent tale that if you can find the lost city of Argent, Valna of the Shields of the Sorrowfell resides there and can heal any ailment.

9. Is there a magic guild my MU belongs to or that I can join in order to get more spells?

The University of the Study of the Arcane Arts and Sciences in Duchy Jepson is the appropriate answer, although critics say that it's just a "wizard mill" designed for rich patrons in Scandshar, so there might be an expectation of service after graduation. Dirthzea'via University in Scandshar and Morgrave University in Sorgforge both have minor magical colleges, but you won't gain much in the way of arcane secrets there.

There are, of course, always rumors of secret societies that may function more like magic guilds. (Maybe skip ahead to Question #17 if you want a more nuanced answer.)

10. Where can I find an alchemist, sage or other expert NPC?

Any of the three aforementioned universities (Dirthzea'via University, Morgrave University, and the University of the Study of the Arcane Arts and Sciences) are good sources, as are most major temples. Of course, specific subjects might require specific sages, which could be very rare indeed. You might have to travel to a remote village or monastery to learn answers to the most obscure questions.

11. Where can I hire mercenaries?

Back before they collapsed, the Illustrious Menagerie of Peacocks was the preeminent mercenary guild in the region. Of course, the economy is bad enough that plenty of folks are looking for work; major cities are likely to have more people with actual martial training, but you can always outfit a crew with your own money and get experience that way...

Weirdly, there are a handful of reports regarding a Blackearth Mercenary Guild, found primarily in the northern Sorrowfell Plains and the Hoarfrost Ridge. They're all alchemical automata, leftovers from the Cackledread War, and they're soldiers in search of a war to fight. That might not be a terrible place to look if you're trying to build a warband.

12. Is there any place on the map where swords are illegal, magic is outlawed or any other notable hassles from Johnny Law?

The roads are dangerous enough that armed travelers aren't considered all that strange, although they might expect to be questioned if a crime is committed with no obvious culprit. There are some foreign lands where arms and magic are more problematic, however.

It is also an unfortunate truth that the law is more likely to hassle certain sorts of demihumans depending on how rare they are; best not to travel alone if you're from the Deepearth or some similarly exotic place.

13. Which way to the nearest tavern?

It's probably close. If a settlement is too small for a tavern, there's probably a public house. If there's no public house, perhaps the one of the locals will give you a meal and a pint homebrewed beer in exchange for work or a bit of coin.

Of course, if you want a proper tavern, head to your nearest city or town and go wherever the tourists and merchants hang out.

14. What monsters are terrorizing the countryside sufficiently that if I kill them I will become famous?

Gnolls. Despite the time that has passed between now and the Cackledread War, enough people remember the war that gnolls are still among the most feared creatures around. You could make a career as a professional gnoll hunter, no problem.

Also, there's still technically a bounty on the Scandshar Six even though no one has seen them in months.

15. Are there any wars brewing I could go fight?

Pundits and armchair sages are always running their mouths, saying that the future trouble is coming from the gnollish warbands scattered across the borderlands, as well as the various goblin and orc tribes to the east. Plenty of respected tacticians have made careers saying that the gnoll or orc attack is coming "any day now."

But it's hard to actually see what's happening in the borderlands when you're a philosopher going to aristocratic parties. Here are some spots people should be worried about, but aren't, in order of most threatening to least:

• A couple of traders are sounding the alarm about massing goblin armies to the south. The adventuring company known as Those Who Remember has recovered intelligence referring to a new "Boss" and "Asset" that appear to be driving this organization, but apart from a few tantalizing glimpses, there is relatively little information on this emerging threat. But rest assured: if not handled soon, it will become a problem for everyone.
• The Blackearth Mercenary Guild isn't well-known and isn't causing trouble, but everyone should probably be a little nervous about a growing group of immortal soldiers with no war to fight. Why are they gathering now, fifty years after the war ended?
• Nainimdul also isn't currently a problem, but this backwater burg features some weird, isolationist elves. If an elf supremacist is going to emerge anywhere, they're going to start in Nainimdul.
• It might not help that faith in a new half-elf deity has started to appear. Religious schisms always make for unstable times.
• Slavery is outlawed in Scandshar, which means that the economy of the Plains and the Sea of Sorrows just reorganized overnight. That is likely to increase tensions among 'Ichi, Nadhi, and the Sorrowfell Plains, which could result in a trade war or even an open naval conflict.
• There are always a bunch of conflicts brewing on the Isle of Anhak to the west. Fortunately, those conflicts don't tend to spread beyond the island, but if you really want to be a professional mercenary right now, get on a boat one of the major port cities. (Just make sure you don't get shipped off to demon-haunted Qelong.)
• There's a rumor that dark elves were organizing warbands of giants in the Hoarfrost Ridge, but the Shields of the Sorrowfell put a stop to it. But they didn't massacre the giants: the Three Corners withstood a siege while the Shields killed the giants' leadership. That means the routed armies are still out there, waiting for some charismatic leader to organize them. That probably won't happen soon, but someone should be thinking about the next couple of human generations...
• Speaking of the dark elves, a lot of Scandshar war hawks want to launch a campaign against the dark elves for their attempted invasion of the surface. The only thing really stopping them is logistics: outfitting armies and building supply lines for an extended foray into the Underworld is a foolish proposition. But if somebody figures that out — or if the right politician can effectively use the drow as scapegoats for enough problems facing Scandshar — then the tacticians are going to start training Scandshar Militia as tunnel-rats.

16. How about gladiatorial arenas complete with hard-won glory and fabulous cash prizes?

All that stuff is in Scandshar. It's not entirely clear how the gladiatorial combat system is going to work now that slavery is outlawed, but that probably just opens the door for gladiators to get a bigger slice of the pie. Lucky for you.

17. Are there any secret societies with sinister agendas I could join and/or fight?

The official word on the street is that the dread conspiracies are shattered. The Illustrious Menagerie of Peacocks was equal parts organized crime syndicate, pyramid scheme, and freaky apocalypse cult, but the group folded and its members scattered when the top brass was all slain over the span of a handful of months. The Broken Chain, a terrorist organization that was also a cult of personality around Morana the Forsaken — yeah, the same "Weeping Morana" from the child's nursery rhyme — likewise collapsed around the same time when a couple of members died and Morana the Forsaken was destroyed. (Uh, I guess she was real, by the way.)

But if you know the secret signs, there are a bunch:

• The Zookeepers/The Children's Crusade/The Sisterhood of the Swan. Not sinister, but they are technically secret societies. Primarily focused on slavery abolition (among other things), it is unclear what will become of them in the coming years. (One expects the Sisterhood of the Swan to keep defending the natural world, while the Children's Crusade will likely become a thieves' guild in the Peacocks' absence. It isn't entirely clear what will become of the Zookeepers, however.)
• The Banite Inquisition. A "secret" cult dedicated to the tyrannical god Bane, positioned at the top of the Scandshar Watch's leadership. (As the air quotes suggest, this isn't common knowledge, but the Banite Inquisition isn't exactly secret, either.) You have to be a guardsman in Scandshar to join.
• The Saraman Voluptuaries. A secret society with ties to organized crime and literally Hell, they've been trying to position themselves for years to take out the Illustrious Menagerie of Peacocks, even having infiltrated their organization. Now that the Peacocks have fallen, they're in the best position to take advantage of the chaos.
• The Raktamar. Although not native to the Sorrowfell Plains, their plans are far-reaching enough that you might still brush against them. Organized under the ancient vampire known in legend as the Blood Lotus, this cabal of vampires have co-opted Nadhi's state religion for their own purposes, essentially turning the whole continent into their private game preserve. With ties to undeath, infernalism, and Orcus-worship, they maintain fingers in many pies via their relatively ironclad control over Nadhi's government.
• The Bulwark of the Hypostases. This is the cabal of illusionists and enchanters teased a few years ago, and their aims are vast and cosmic: they're altering memories and manipulating geopolitics in the hopes of a total paradigm shift. In the long-term, they hope to bolster the membranes among the planes, finally allowing humans and demihumans to stand on their own two feet without extraplanar entities interfering in their affairs. It's a lofty goal, and it is unclear as to what would happen in the long-term. Would there still be magic? Would demihumans survive?
• This isn't a bad choice for a Magic-User guild from Question #9, if you plan on becoming an Enchanter or Illusionist. And don't mind having bosses with weird agendas.
• The Sodalicium Remegni. A group of vampire wizards, formerly a secret faction embedded in the University of the Study of the Arcane Arts and Sciences but forced to leave for greener pastures. Their current whereabouts are unknown, but since the rumors say they traditionally number thirteen but are down a member, they might be recruiting...
• They have ties to the Raktamar, which should be troubling to absolutely everyone. 
• This might also not be a bad choice if you're looking for a Magic-User guild from Question #9, as long as you're whimsically evil and willing to become a vampire.
• The Disciples of the Barrens. A cult dedicated to the demon lord Oublivae, they seek the downfall of Scandshar as part of their program of the complete dismantling of civilization as we understand it. They weren't taken all that seriously until they purged most of the other demon cults in Scandshar over the past year or so.

In addition to the above factions, the noble families of Scandshar and the mercantile families of Sorgforge probably also count as secret societies, given their vast resources and far-ranging schemes.

18. What is there to eat around here?

Culturally, the Sorrowfell Plains are the standard European, Renn Faire-style amusement park you have come to expect, so the food is an anachronistic morass of things that should never share an ecosystem. (Especially since the presence of the Olman suggests that the oldest human cuisine in the area is Aztec or Hispanic!) Root vegetables, grains, and meat and dairy harvested from livestock form the base of the diet. Beer and clean water are plentiful. Trade with 'Ichi, Anhak, and Nadhi mean that urban centers or trade routes may enjoy exotic dishes, while local customs (such as the corpse cakes of the western Sorrowfell Plains) may prevail in certain spots.

19. Any legendary lost treasures I could be looking for?

A few. Some claim the Crux of Eternity, the weapon forged by the gods to slay the Primordials, has recently reappeared in the Sorrowfell Plains; if true, it is a treasure with powers beyond measure. Its antithesis, the Doom of Divinity, is also a frequent target for Primordial cultists and blasphemers. Other legendary treasures include Cage (a luckblade that imprisons the efreeti Padishah Nurhan Solak, allowing the wielder to utilize his wishes but freeing him if the third wish is used); the Giantbane Hammer of Onyxarm (a standard dwarven thrower but with a legendary backstory rendering it as dwarf Excalibur); the Seeker's Staff (a wizard's staff developed by demonologist Gingor the Seeker and maybe containing his soul); and the snailstones (artifacts from the Temple of the Snail that draw dreamers across time and space to ally with the holder).

20. Where is the nearest dragon or other monster with Type H treasure?

Make no mistake: dragons are here, but they haven't been seen in a long time. Go back a few hundred years and the big news in Scandshar was the reign of terror of Benthosruthsa before he either left the area or went to sleep. More recently, there are a few sightings of younger dragons like Vilustuminen the White (which has since been slain) or Daurgoth the Toxic Foetor (last reported in the Feywalk Woods). A few legends of mature dragons spread, but they are likewise spotty (like sightings of silver and topaz dragons in the Hoarfrost Ridge) or describe dragons that have since been slain (like Urytenurarveia the Bogbeast of the Bogbeast Fens). In theory, Urytenurarvei's sister Silhouette is still at large, although she has not been seen in many years.

But if you want to go after big game, here are a few of the tales occasionally told around campfires:

• Hjertavbeybrannen the Smoldering Ember. Said to have disappeared many centuries ago. This raises the uncomfortable possibility that it is sleeping, and may yet awaken. Interested parties look to the recent schism in the kobold lair of Okarthelvrant in the foothills of the Hoarfrost Ridge with no small amount of trepidation.
• Jalanumerrurr the Bastion of Bahamut. Said to lair in a secret place guarding a treasure known only to the dragon-god Bahamut. Clues in old tomes suggest this secret place might be in the Sorrowfell Plains, and the occasional tall tale is told regarding a gold dragon of enormous size in the borderlands.
• Stórskjaldbaka the Invincible. A dragon turtle of enormous size, said to be the offspring of the World Turtle described by the sea peoples and worshiped as a god by some tribes. If it exists, it is both ancient and powerful, and might not even reside in the world anymore. (Some obscure records suggests it makes its home "among the stars.") Some tales claim the lost city of Orpokoti rests on its back, so it likely carries its hoard with it.

Other monsters with large amounts of treasure might include the legendary vampire known as the Blood Lotus; the lich Lazghul, the Opal of Chaos with Teeth of Jet and the Dress of Silence (presumed destroyed, but a couple of recent anecdotes suggest he is still around); and the undead beholder Lord Sepsis, one of the few remaining lords of the Illustrious Menagerie of Peacocks.