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Showing posts with label tables. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tables. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 3, 2023

Why Is This Item Cursed?

On a post about cursed items, someone wrote, "I have never liked cursed items. Why would someone make one?"

I responded with a brief table. If you want to know why a given cursed item exists, roll 1d8 and consult the table below:

  1. Failed magic item project of an ancient civilization's wizarding grad school equivalent.
  2. Evil wizard or unseelie Fair Folk crafted item as a magical trap or revenge piece.
  3. Mundane object infused with fell magical energies as a side effect of a magical catastrophe.
  4. Magic item granted as part of a poorly-worded wish.
  5. Functional magic item corrupted by forgotten decades in an evil lair or by infusion with wicked sapience.
  6. Perfectly normal magic item in extremely alien and forgotten culture. ("We use bags of devouring to solve our trash problem!")
  7. Curse is an unintended side effect of the item's creation, and was overlooked by the creators.
  8. Item belonged to a famous hero who offended a god, archwizard, or other powerful entity and cursed their favored magic item.

Thursday, November 10, 2022

What Happens When I Eat the Corpse Cake?

In the Sorrowfell Plains, the locals often call confessors or counselors, "sin-eaters." As with many terms, the origin is obscure to the average pseudo-medieval peasant, but scholars recognize that the villages of the western Sorrowfell Plains still maintain traditional funerary rites*, including leaving an offering upon the decedent's body which is then consumed by the mourners.

While this is often a celebratory practice, hoping that one will gain some of the positive qualities of the deceased, there is another aspect to the ritual. Those families who worry that their loved one's sins will cause them to rise as undead, or who have heard the heretical claims that the dead (called "petitioners") spend their afterlives in the Astral Reaches, will often feed this bread to a priest or other confessor, hoping that such a person will be able to take their loved one's sin and purify it. Other families or villages, cleaving more to the scapegoat model of morality (or lacking a local priest), may instead pay a poor person or a traveler to eat it in the hopes that they will go elsewhere and take the sin with them.

(Astute observers will also note that this trend is repeated across many such times and places. Interested parties are directed to examine sin-eating as practiced in historical Europe over the past few centuries.)

This sounds like the perfect excuse to put a funeral on your "What's happening in this random village?" chart, and have the locals try to sell the funerary bread to the adventurers passing through town in the hopes that they will take the sin with them. Locals are unlikely to offer much for this service: the traditional pay in Wales was six pence, and while I expect pseudo-medieval peasants and their ilk to not offer more than a gold piece for such an act, nobles might be willing to offer outrageous sums to travelers willing to eat the funerary bread.

If your system of choice offers XP-for-gold, it's up to you whether you grant XP for the gold given. I probably would, given that there's risk involved and since the money is likely to be low: a concerned and desperate noble will ensure your room-and-board for the night and might be willing to pay up to 100gp. It is unlikely that they would pay more unless they are certain the decedent's sins are truly grave, but what are the odds of someone doing something that horrible in private? Unless the characters are foreign and so are completely ignorant of the decedent's reputation...

So what's the harm? A free meal and ten gold pieces for your trouble? Why would you say no?

What Happens When I Eat the Corpse Cake?

Each player who partakes rolls 1d20. (The GM may prefer to roll, since a lot of these changes aren't immediately obvious.) Being under the effects of a spell like protection from evil completely prevents the following effects, which is why clerics are often preferred as sin-eaters.

1d20 Effect
1-12
No effect.
13
Roll a save vs. spell (BECMI) or a DC 13 Charisma save (5e). If you fail, your alignment inverts: Lawful becomes Chaotic (or vice versa) and Good becomes Evil (or vice versa). Neutral stays the same.
14
Roll a save vs. spell (BECMI) or a DC 13 Charisma save (5e). If you fail, your alignment changes to Evil, although the Law vs. Chaos axis remains the same. (If you're playing something like BECMI with only Law vs. Chaos, your alignment changes to Chaotic instead.)
15
You now detect as Evil/Chaotic/fiendish/bad for the purposes of spells and effects such as detect evil.
16
If there's a Bad Place™ to go when you die, you're headed there. Resurrection spells and other such effects don't work on you unless your party figures out how to get your soul out of cosmic impound first. (Revivify-style magic still works as long as the soul hasn't departed the body yet.) An appropriate purification ritual or quest can also free you from Hell, but since this corruption has no outward sign, you might not know until it's too late.
17
A small fiend — an imp, a quasit, or even just a regular animal with some weird demonic traits — starts following you around, serving you as a familiar. It hates you and wants to tempt you into evil acts, both to increase the net evil in the world and to condemn your soul when you die.
18
The decedent's sin pools in your head, giving voice to the worst, most self-destructive parts of you. (If this sounds similar to Shadowguiding from Wraith: The Oblivion, you know exactly how to play this.) Your bad side can consult with you telepathically and offer you advantage on any roll (roll two dice and take the better result), although it is under no obligation to do so and you are under no obligation to take the advantage. Once per day, it can attempt to possess you, controlling your actions for one hour: make a save vs. spell or DC 13 Charisma save to resist. The difficulty of the test is modified by the number of times you accepted advantage that day. (So if you accepted help twice, you're at a -2 to resist possession.) Smart evil sides do not volunteer this fact and do not attempt possession often. Your evil side can potentially be exorcised by appropriate spells (such as dispel evil), abilities, quests, and the like. It will attempt to pressure you into performing its own agenda, which may be your worst impulses and secret desires, the original decedent's worst impulses, or a mix of the two.
19
Corruption takes root in the flesh. Roll a save vs. paralyzation or a DC 15 Constitution saving throw or gain a mutation from the GM's favorite mutation table. (I personally recommend The Metamorphica, Realm of Chaos, or Tome of Corruption.)
20
No obvious change, but at midnight, a powerful fiend comes to tempt you. It can offer you anything the GM considers appropriate. It ultimately wants to purchase your soul, but might be willing to settle for less if it thinks it can goad you into corrupting someone or making future purchases later.
21
I don't know what qualifies for a +1 on this chart — maybe you ate all the funerary cakes by yourself, or the decedent was a really wicked dude, or you made a real ass of yourself at the funerary meal and someone surreptitiously cursed you — but if you somehow roll this, you die at dinner. A fiendish creature (again, maybe a fiend on the GM's demonic list of choice, or a weird mutant animal) bursts forth from you like the xenomorph to start terrorizing the countryside. (Or maybe you turn into a Deadite or something. Any option is fine, so long as it births a new monster from your flesh.) To add insult to injury, your soul is probably consigned to whatever bad corner of the afterlife exists in this world, and your flesh is so corrupted you can't be resurrected.

* According to the scholars, these funerary traditions were adapted from Olman rites into their current form. Contrast with the folk of the Feywalk Woods: the Maiavainrua elves are known to use magical rites to keep their dead around as counselors and honored ancestors, so many of the local villages in and around the wood maintain traditions involving prolonged mourning practices and embalming. Drigbolton, found on the northern edge of the Feywalk Woods near the elven town of En'amanisrahd, is cited as one of the most starling examples of these practices, at least to outsiders.

Developer Commentary: The general idea is that the characters get a free bed, a free meal, and some pocket change with a 40% chance of getting what is hopefully a weird and interesting curse. If you want to make D&D cosmology more present or turn this into more of an enticing gamble, expand this table into a 1d24 chart with eight additional entries for Good, no effect for Neutral, and the entries for 13-20 representing Evil. (Or expand the chart to your heart's content. Maybe true Goodness and true Evil are so rare that it's a d100 chart with only eight entries on one end, eight on the other, and eighty-four nonentries in between.) Also, in case it needs to be said, this assumes the generic, Gygax-style vague Christianity endemic to D&D and its imitators. If your setting or fantasy elfgame of choice has different assumptions, this will likely be tonally dissonant with the rest of your setting. (Unless you decide Hell is real, but only to the residents of this one village, which sounds delightful. "Hell is real, but only in Gawkes Mere," is a fun potential plot hook.)

Friday, October 27, 2017

Modern United States Random Name Generator

Did I never share this?  Apparently I never shared this.

For my Unknown Armies game, I built a random name generator using U.S. Census data.  First name data comes from 1974 birth records (representing the mean age in 2011), and surname data comes from 1990.  It generates ten male and ten female names at a time, in what should represent a statistically accurate distribution (at least according to Behind the Name).  Click CTRL+R to refresh (but don't be a jerk and edit it, or else I'll be forced to hunt you down).

Random Name Generator

Monday, July 27, 2015

YOU CAN NOT HAVE A MEANINGFUL BIRTHDAY IF STRICT CAKE RECORDS ARE NOT KEPT

It's Gary Gygax's birthday!  The referee may include a preplanned encounter with fondue, a cask conditioned ale, and Gold & Mild cigars.  Alternately, the referee may roll 1d10 for birthday cake:

1. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/hot-milk-cake
2. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/chocolate-truffle-cake
3. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/cream-cheese-pound-cake
4. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/toffee-poke-cake
5. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/pineapple-pudding-cake
6. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/vermont-maple-pecan-cake
7. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/chocolate-banana-cream-cake
8. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/classic-carrot-cake
9. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/chunky-apple-cake
10. http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/ultimate-chocolate-cake

In the event of a random cake encounter, the day is usually arranged into three periods (breakfast, lunch, and dinner).  Cake has a 1-in-20 chance of appearing at any of these times.  This may be adjusted according to the referee's game milieu.

Monday, July 28, 2014

Dave Ryder Random Nickname Generator


About two-and-a-half weeks ago, Charm Monster released the East/West Bowl Random Name Generator.  A friend of mine recommended doing one for Dave Ryder (of Space Mutiny fame) according to his list of MST3K nicknames.

So, without further ado, roll 1d46 (go on random.org if you're stuck):

01 Beat PunchBeef
02 Big, Brave Brick of Meat
03 Big McLargeHuge
04 Blast HardCheese
05 Blast ThickNeck
06 Bob Johnson
07 Bold BigFlank
08 Bulk VanderHuge
09 Brick HardMeat
10 Buck PlankChest
11 Buff DrinkLots
12 Buff HardBack
13 Butch DeadLift
14 ChunkHead
15 Chunky
16 Crud BoneMeal
17 Crunch ButtSteak
18 Dirk HardPec
19 Fist RockBone
20 Flink
21 Flint IronStag
22 Fridge LargeMeat
23 Gristle McThornBody
24 Hack BlowFist
25 Hunk
26 Lump BeefBroth
27 Punch RockGroin
28 Punch Side-Iron
29 Punt SpeedChunk
30 Reef BlastBody
31 Roll Fizzlebeef
32 Rip SteakFace
33 Slab BulkHead
34 Slab SquatThrust
35 Slam
36 Slate Fistcrunch
37 Slate SlabRock
38 Smash LampJaw
39 Smoke ManMuscle
40 Splint ChestHair
41 Stump BeefKnob
42 Stump Chunkman
43 Thick McRunFast
44 Touch RustRod
45 Trunk SlamChest
46 Whip SlagCheek

Friday, November 1, 2013

Money Conversions

So, in the previous post, I discussed my early modern Unknown Armies game.

However, I neglected to share a useful thing I made.

The Ascension of the Magdalene gives a conversion statistic for Venetian ducats to D&D gp.  I also found a reference document converting the various currencies found in 1632.  (That document also relates old currency to modern United States dollars.)

Since all statistics indicate that early modern British pounds, shillings, and pence are roughly equivalent to Warhammer's gold crowns, silver shillings, and copper pennies, I also put those in the conversion.

Using all these statistics, I made a chart that converts Venetian ducats, Dutch lions, Dutch guilders, Dutch stuivers, gp (with a separate entry for the extremely valuable gold pieces in LotFP), sp, cp, WFRP gc, WFRP s, WFRP p, and modern USD.

Hopefully this is useful to you.  View the "1610 UA Currency Chart."

Monday, July 8, 2013

Fiend Folio World: Llurb Tdunon


(Apart from any errant travelers who may happen upon the world, Llurb Tdunon is entirely made of Fiend Folio creatures.  Feel free to check out the Fiend Folio-only encounter tables that accompany this world.)

Set in the same star system as Rockulon Prime, Llurb Tdunon is an enormous world (albeit with Earth-strength gravity), hundreds of thousands of miles in diameter.  (In Spelljammer terms, it's a Size H, Type E spherical world.)  Llurb Tdunon is a savage land of tundra, desert, forest, and jungle.  Like Rockulon Prime, Llurb Tdunon's development was also influenced by the coming of the Space-God.  Unlike Rockulon Prime, Llurb Tdunon did not play host to the dead-but-undying deity's corpus, but rather, the planet was infused with large quantities of the Space-God's blood (so much so that it has a somewhat ruddy hue, and even has a series of red rings, formed by frozen blood droplets).  The quantity of deific blood prompted both strange evolutionary lineages as well as the proliferation of extraplanar portals.  Various outsiders — such as githzerai and githyankislaads, and even the occasional devil — roam the landscape.  It is said that the Princes of Elemental Evil even roam the landscape in material forms.

The natives, largely ignorant of the mythos of the Space-God, instead worship the strange outsiders that have come to be known on this world.  In addition to the Princes of Elemental Evil, the planet's inhabitants are also known to worship Ssendam, Lord of Insanity, and Ygorl, Lord of Entropy.  While many of the planet's drow worship the Princes of Elemental Evil, some have turned to the heretical worship of Lolth, Demon Queen of Spiders.  (Oddly, apart from retrievers, there aren't really any spider-like creatures on Llurb Tdunon.  Scholars think the local populace either treat the spiders as mythological creatures, or that some of the drow originate off-world and brought spider lore with them.)

Note that the good races typically also worship these deities, although their prayers and sacrifices are largely rituals of placation, and they tend to worship different aspects of the deities.  The Princes of Elemental Evil, for example, are venerated simply for their connection to natural forces, while some clerics refer to healing spells as "The Closing of Lord Ygorl's Eye," referring to the idea that the Lord of Entropy's ignorance allows growth and healing to happen.

All-in-all, Llurb Tdunon is a savage land populated by monstrous humanoids and weird creatures.  Barring visitors from other worlds and planes, native sapient races include creatures such as aarakocrabullywugs, dakon, drow, flinds, githzerai, kenkusvirfneblin, and the like.  With no native unifying race, the races tend to be insular and largely keep to themselves.  (Adventuring parties composed of humanoids, however, occasionally occur.)  As such, cities tend to have lots of untamed land between them, and they tend to organize along racial lines.

(Parties interested in the background of Llurb Tdunon may wish to read about the development of Fiend Folio encounter tables.)

Fiend Folio World: Fiend Folio Encounter Tables

(If you just came here for the Fiend Folio wandering monster tables, click the following link: View: Fiend Folio Wandering Monster Tables.)

Long before I started blogging, Jeff Rients mentioned the idea of "proscriptive campaign creation," referring to a campaign with certain intentional limits.  In the linked post, he discusses using Booklet 2: Monsters and Magical Items of S4 The Lost Caverns of Tsojcanth as the starting point of a campaign setting, but he also mentions the prospect of using 1981's Fiend Folio as the basis of a campaign setting.

While adventuring through the OSR blogosphere, I feel like I've heard this concept a couple of times, and decided that since I'm working on a Spelljammer game for my associates, now would be as good a time as any to work on the concept.  (For that matter, the Spelljammer core box set notes the possibility of using obscure Fiend Folio creatures to populate a world on pages 11 and 12 of Lorebook of the Void.)

As such, I decided to make a Fiend Folio-only campaign setting.

I'm really just here for the Fiend Folio stuff

Before I bore you with a ton of design notes, here are the Fiend Folio-only wandering monster tables in Google Drive spreadsheet format.  If that's all you want, just follow that link and you're good to go.  They're not terribly pretty, and they're not in a good format for printing, but they're readable.

When I decided to make a Folian setting, I discovered (to my surprise) that it had not yet been done publicly.  Jeff Rients has been compiling any data people post regarding the Fiend Folio, but there isn't much apart from a few musings on the subject.  In terms of AD&D-style data points, there were only two: Rients' own post on the Folian mythos, detailing the bleak gods of the Fiend Folio, and  Chris Hogan's Fiend Folio-only wandering monster tables, showing only the Dungeon Level wandering monster tables.  (Special thanks to Chris Hogan of Vaults of Nagoh for compiling those tables, because that jumping-off point was exceedingly helpful.)

So, over the course of a few days, I converted all of Hogan's tables to d100, removed any errant non-Fiend Folio results (his tables include humans, rival adventuring parties, demon princes, and groaning spirits), and reduced the "DM's Option" results (which I interpret as either DM's choice or special encounter tables or whatever) to 3% of the chart.

I also proceeded to convert all of the wilderness tables to D100 and remove all the Monster Manual results.

Here are more relevant notes:
  • These tables assume access to TSR's 1981 Fiend Folio for AD&D 1e.  Several of the creatures have been reprinted elsewhere, so it's not totally necessary, but everything makes more sense if you have it.
  • As per the original Fiend Folio, the aleax, denzelian, hound of ill omen, terithran, and trilloch are omitted (although the terithran appears on the Ethereal Encounter Table).  The creatures typically only appear in specific circumstances.
  • All percentages are kept as originally on the random encounter charts.  I make the same assumption as Chris Hogan and assume creature frequency is the same in a Folian world.
  • DM's Option is whatever the DM chooses.  You can throw a rival adventuring party into the mix, use a special encounter table, pick a creature you want to use, or whatever.  (If you're stuck for ideas, you can always just re-roll.)
  • As in the original text, the wilderness charts feature several italicized creature names.  These creatures have a 75% likelihood to be encountered airborne.
  • I replaced the number appearing distributions with dice ranges.
If I made any glaring errors on the charts, feel free to leave feedback in the comments.  And make sure you check out the tables.

(Also, interested parties may wish to check out the sample world of Llurb Tdunon.)

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

The Maim Cabinet

For the curious, I'm still alive.  It's been a little while since I've posted anything that's not a Deadlands replay, so here's what you missed:

I've mentioned a Spelljammer game a couple of times, and it has already begun.  (Watch this space for updates if you're into that sort of thing.)  Anyway, since this is first-level characters in AD&D, I decided to make a hack to make combat slightly less deadly, but at great cost.

So You Should Probably Be Dead

As soon as a character hits 0 hit points, that character typically dies.  (A variant rule lets characters survive up to -10 hit points, with critically wounded characters worsening by one hit point per round until death.)  This rule exists somewhere between those two.

Under this rule, when a character hits 0 or fewer hit points, that character can still be revived as long as a would-be healer gets to the character within one round.  (Keep in mind that AD&D rounds are a minute long, so that should be plenty of time; the DM can modify this as necessary.)  As long as any healing brings the character above 1 hit point, the character is revived.

Of course, it's not that simple.  The character took a shock that most people would not survive, and in fact, that probably required magic to save you.  You should be dead.  As such, you probably took a serious, permanent, and crippling injury.

As such, any character so revived needs to roll his or her System Shock percentage (DMs who don't use System Shock may take a CON check or a saving throw vs. death or whatever appropriate check you can contemplate instead).  Success indicates that hit points are healed, the character is revived, and everything is okay.  Failure means that the character rolls 1d20 on the Injury Table, below.  Negative hit points are applied as modifiers to the roll below, so a character at 0 hit points takes no penalty, a character at -1 hit points takes a -1 penalty to the d20 roll, and so on.  Simple, right?

Injuries on the table below can be healed by way of a regenerate spell or local equivalent, when appropriate.  (These injuries probably also disappear on subsequent resurrections, as well.)  The DM is the ultimate arbiter for what is required to heal such an injury.  (Likewise, the DM can always a declare a character beyond saving through this method.  Death from poison, massive damage, decapitation, and suchlike are viable choices.  In such case, only raising the character from the dead will work.)

Roll 1d20:

20: Only a Flesh Wound: No further injuries beyond hit point loss.
19: Lingering Scars: No real mechanical injuries, but the character suffers from chronic pain.  She can probably predict when it's about to rain with reasonable accuracy.
18: Disfigured: Your scars are significant enough to influence people's opinion of you.  Take a -1 reaction adjustment penalty.
17: Broken Limb: Randomly determine a limb.  That limb is broken.  A broken arm prevents the user from using that arm for anything and temporarily removes 1d4 Strength from the victim.  A broken leg reduces the user's movement speed by half and temporarily removes 1d4 Dexterity from the victim.  Lost ability points return at a rate of 1 per week assuming the limb is completely immobilized.  Failure to properly rest the limb while it heals assesses a permanent -1 penalty to all actions with the limb (and improperly healing a leg means that the victim always treats her encumbrance score as one category worse than it actually is for the purposes of determining speed).  Assuming the limb heals properly, it is thereafter treated as a Lingering Scars result.
16: Gelded: The character's reproductive organs are damaged, and the character is now sterile.
15: Injured Larynx: The character's larynx was injured.  The character cannot talk above a whisper, and cannot shout.  There is a 10% chance that the larynx is injured beyond any use, meaning that the character cannot speak (only making quiet, rasping noises) and cannot cast spells requiring verbal components.
14: Aphasia: The character has difficulty communicating with others.  Lose 1d4 Charisma.
13: Delirium: The character suffers from chronic confusion.  Lose 1d4 Wisdom.
12: Brain Injury: The character suffers from intelligence loss.  Lose 1d4 Intelligence.
11: Injured Spine: The character suffers from balance issues and loss of coordination.  Lose 1d4 Dexterity.
10: Gut Wound: The character suffers from a devastating wound to the torso.  Lose 1d4 Constitution.
9: Bad Back: The character suffers from a muscular dysfunction.  Lose 1d4 Strength.
8: Missing Eye: The character suffers from a -1 penalty whenever depth perception is a useful element (such as melee combat), and a -2 penalty whenever depth perception is vital (such as ranged combat).
7: Ruptured Eardrums: The character is totally deaf.
6: Maimed Limb: As Broken Limb, but the condition is permanent.
5: Blindness: The character loses all eyesight, acting as if in total darkness.
4: Punctured Lung: The character loses 1d4 Constitution, and has difficulties with exertion.  Overland movement is half normal, and any period of strenuous physical activity (maybe a minute or so) requires a Constitution check or else the character loses a round catching her breath.
3: Damaged Heart: As Punctured Lung, except a failed Constitution check requires an immediate saving throw vs. death or else the character suffers an immediate and fatal heart attack.
2: Retrograde Amnesia: The character loses a level.  Experience points and hit points remain, but the character acts in all other respects as if she were one level lower than she actually is.
1: Coma: Your character revives, but falls unconscious immediately.  Assuming proper care and nourishment, the character can make a Constitution check every 1d8 weeks.  Failure indicates the coma persists, while success indicates the character awakens.  A character loses a number of ability score points equal to the number of weeks spent in the coma.  These points should be taken from random ability scores, as determined by the DM.
0 or below: Death: Your character is dead.  A generous DM might rule that, since you were revived and died again, you rouse enough in your final moments to give some final words to your would-be savior.  A grim confession?  An enigmatic statement?  A touching memory?  The choice is yours.

A Note for 4e Fans: Parties interested in grievous injuries for 4e should consult the Less Death, More Danger! article from Dungeon 204.

Second Note: One of the resources consulted for this post was this Giant in the Playground forum post for 3rd edition house rules regarding maiming.  It talks about wounded characters in general and has a much simpler injury table than is recorded above.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Secret Santicore 2012: Random Equipment

Due to unforeseen circumstances, Secret Santicore 2012 will not be released.  Wampus Country details the affair here.

But, individual Santicorians (Santicorons? Santicoids?) are posting their stuff, so I figured I might as well do the same.

I was requested to make a random chart for starting equipment.  This was rather daunting as there are several excellent starting equipment charts currently available — Hill Cantons made one, Untimately made one, and Abulafia has one (I'm sure I missed some good ones, but those form a good starting point).

Anyway, without further ado, here it is.  If you have need of a random equipment list for starting-level old-school D&D characters, hopefully it meets your needs.

Secret Santicore 2012: Random Starting Equipment

Addendum: In lieu of a pdf, Santicore articles will be released by the production staff on http://santicore.blogspot.com/.  Read 'em, they're good for you!

Addendum 2, Electric Boogaloo: Here's my entry, evidently from another Secret Santicore blog.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Random Shakespearean Insult Generator

So, there are several, but here's a Shakespearean insult generator.  It combines canonical Shakespearean insults with a list from this Shakespeare Insult Kit.

What's that?  You don't have your computer handy?

Good thing you printed it as a d50 table.  (Also available in Google Docs if you want a spreadsheet format.)

Roll 3d50 (or 3d100 if you prefer) and arrange as "Thou [column 1 result] [column 2 result] [column 3 result]!"


d50d100Column 1Column 2Column 3
11-2artlessbase-courtapple-john
23-4bawdybat-fowlingbaggage
35-6beslubberingbeef-wittedbarnacle
47-8bootlessbeetle-headedbladder
59-10churlishboil-brainedboar-pig
611-12cockeredclapper-clawedbugbear
713-14cloutedclay-brainedbum-bailey
815-16cravencommon-kissingcanker-blossom
917-18currishcrook-patedclack-dish
1019-20dankishdismal-dreamingclotpole
1121-22dissemblingdizzy-eyedcoxcomb
1223-24droningdogheartedcodpiece
1325-26errantdread-bolteddeath-token
1427-28fawningearth-vexingdewberry
1529-30fobbingelf-skinnedflap-dragon
1631-32frowardfat-kidneyedflax-wench
1733-34frothyfen-suckedflirt-gill
1835-36gleekingflap-mouthedfoot-licker
1937-38goatishfly-bittenfustilarian
2039-40gorbelliedfolly-fallengiglet
2141-42impertinentfool-borngudgeon
2243-44infectiousfull-gorgedhaggard
2345-46jarringguts-gripingharpy
2447-48loggerheadedhalf-facedhedge-pig
2549-50lumpishhasty-wittedhorn-beast
2651-52mammeringhedge-bornhugger-mugger
2753-54mangledhell-hatedjoithead
2855-56mewlingidle-headedlewdster
2957-58paunchyill-breedinglout
3059-60pribblingill-nurturedmaggot-pie
3161-62pukingknotty-patedmalt-worm
3263-64punymilk-liveredmammet
3365-66quallingmotley-mindedmeasle
3467-68rankonion-eyedminnow
3569-70reekyplume-pluckedmiscreant
3671-72roguishpottle-deepmoldwarp
3773-74ruttishpox-markedmumble-news
3875-76saucyreeling-ripenut-hook
3977-78spleenyrough-hewnpigeon-egg
4079-80spongyrude-growingpignut
4181-82surlyrump-fedputtock
4283-84totteringshard-bornepumpion
4385-86unmuzzledsheep-bitingratsbane
4487-88vainspur-galledscut
4589-90venomedswag-belliedskainsmate
4691-92villainoustardy-gaitedstrumpet
4793-94warpedtickle-brainedvarlot
4895-96waywardtoad-spottedvassal
4997-98weedyunchin-snoutedwhey-face
5099-100yeastyweather-bittenwagtail

Monday, July 2, 2012

Resources for You

Here are some things you should watch, read, or view.

This article from the Daily Mail depicts Wonderland, a series of fantasy photographs.  Check 'em out for inspiration.

Serendipity has a series of random generators for things such as cities, medieval names, fantasy novel titles, and suchlike.  For all your random generation needs.

And finally, if you need creative insults, there's the Insult Generator.  Perfect for depicting someone who's just a touch off-kilter.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Down the Glen Tramp Little Men

The alternate title for this was "Fifty Shades of...Followers," but I decided to nab a line from a classic poem instead.

Ahem.  So, this past Monday, (that's June 4 if you're reading this in the grimdark future), I hit fifty followers.  (Ironically, as with my first follower, my fiftieth follower is someone I know personally in my Monkeysphere.)

Incidentally, I was at 271 posts at the time.  So I guess that's something, too.

At any rate, to celebrate, here are fifty things you can find at the local Goblin Market, Swap Meet, or other genre-specific eldritch market.

Fifty Strange Objects

1. Several sheets of flash paper containing several examples of Victorian erotic art.  If the pages are burned together and the smoke is inhaled, the character will get a vision of the location of a hidden sorcerer's crypt containing untold riches and rituals.

2. A thumb drive containing a .mpeg file depicting an elementary school play.  It appears to be a play about woodland animals learning to live in harmony, but during the final musical number, a soloist steps forward and begins reciting a monologue from The King in Yellow.  Screaming starts just before the media player crashes.

3. The Box.

4. Nineteen left socks.

5. A mad sorcerer's grimoire written on a single, continuous piece of tanned hide.  Analysis suggests it's human skin.

6. A Glock 17 that oozes human tears whenever it is fired.

7. A singer's voice in a wooden box.

8. The memory of a comical loss of virginity.

9. A box containing several years' worth of the Fortean Times.  Someone has written "True" or "False" next to each article heading.

10. A clay figurine which is supposedly some sort of homunculus, although the activation commands are forgotten.  In truth, it is merely a prison for the soul of a dead magus.  Note that both things may be true — if the proper syllables are spoken, it may be forced to animate and obey the petitioner.

11. A vicious knifing.

12. An aluminum water bottle of purple liquid.  This liquid has all the typical effects of LSD, save that the user can also see ghosts.

13. The memory of a mundane family vacation to the beach.

14. A hamburger in sealed lucite.  The plaque indicates that it was purchased from McDonald's on December 12, 1948, making it one of the first hamburgers sold at the renovated San Bernardino location.

15. Bigfoot's Social Security card.

16. Something off this Goblin Market table.

17. A snowglobe, depicting a small town in the Midwest and evidently originating from their chamber of commerce.  When the snowglobe is shaken, it rains (or snows) in the actual town.

18. A silverware set made by Paul Revere.  Old stains that look like strange rust cover some of the pieces.  If any old DNA can be extracted, it is revealed to be wolf blood.

19. A black garbage bag full of fingernail clippings.

20. A copy of the famous August 1991 issue of Vanity Fair featuring a nude, pregnant Demi Moore on the cover.  If examined closely, one can see the vague outline of an inhuman shape in her pregnant belly.

21. A fleeting memory of the color jale.

22. The Axe with the Edge of the Sun.

23. A ball-peen hammer.  Any slot machine touched with this ball-peen hammer will release its jackpot.

24. A dog's corpse, prepared with taxidermy.  Any cavities in the body are filled with fortune cookie fortunes.

25. A jar of baby teeth.

26. A brown glass eye.  If placed in an empty eye socket, it renders the user completely immune to injuries sustained from car accidents, even if she is thrown clear of the vehicle.

27. A set of polyhedral dice made of meteoric iron.

28. A dirty speculum.  If touched to a wooden object, an image of the woodwright will appear in the user's head, along with an impression of the person's name.  If the object is mass produced, the user will get an impression of everybody involved in its creation.

29. An unlabeled VHS tape.  The tape appears to be an amateur documentary on a man named "Phil" as he goes through his errands.  Any person, place, or thing with a supernatural talent or origin exudes a golden halo.  Phil is not supernatural, but several things in the background of the video are.

30. A hatchet head, pitted with rust stains.

31. A collection of 57 wheat pennies.

32. A musket ball, retrieved from a human cadaver.

33. Something off this Random Magical Junk table.

34. A CD of The Art of War by Bone Thugs-N-Harmony.  The CD is heavily scratched and cannot be played, although when held to the light, the scratches appear to form arcane symbols.

35. A recipe for a medieval immortality elixir, pieced together as a collage of magazine clippings.

36. A clump of bees, pickled in formaldehyde.  Close examination reveals that the bees' legs have grown together, forming the clump of bees.

37. A child's drawing of a black shape labeled "CENTER TOOME."

38. A toy steak, carved from wood and painted.

39. A leather wallet stuffed with joss paper in the form of Hell bank notes.

40. A rattle.  It appears to be a Barbie leg jammed into a baby doll's head, and the head is filled with some sort of object (beads? bones?) to make it rattle.  The baby head is haphazardly decorated as a jester's ninny-stick.

41. A yellowed sheet of vellum containing a recipe for hummus.  The Latin writings sarcastically refer to it as a work of alchemy, which might confuse a modern scholar.

42. A violin that makes music so terrible it causes actual psychological stress in victims.

43. A monocle.  If dipped in milk, it allows the user to diagnose any illnesses currently affecting any person the user can see.

44. A jar of dappled light, filtered through autumn leaves.

45. A Ziploc bag of black piano keys.

46. An unlabeled 5 1/4" floppy disk.  Assuming the operator can run the program, the screen will read, "COORDINATES?"  If the operator inputs a valid address, the program will read "Y" if a magical item is present in the location and "N" if one is not present.

47. An elephant's leg, hollowed out as an umbrella stand.  It still emanates the infrasonic signals used by elephants to communicate over long distances.  If somehow decoded, it appears to be a mating signal.

48. A baseball cap which, when worn, makes the wearer seem appropriately dressed.  It does not alter appearance, and it does not allow the wearer to enter places where he would not be allowed, but it does mean that the character can wear a T-shirt and jeans to a formal affair and not be turned away based upon his mode of dress.

49. A sardine key that opens any lock it touches.

50. Six hairs in a jar stoppered with wax and human blood.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Magic in Carcosa

Forgive a spot of rambling, but I have this Carcosa megadungeon in mind.

Don't get all excited.  I don't know when I'll be ready to run, and this is the same megadungeon I noted back in January.  Since I'd almost assuredly open it to FLAILSNAILS, that means I have to consider Clerics and Magic-Users that might arrive from other games.

Is it absolutely necessary to change the magic rules?  Probably not.  However, I would like to highlight the weirdness that is Carcosa, and accentuate the fact that native Carcosans are probably the best equipped to handle Carcosa (although I really like the persistent idea that some planeswalker will arrive and start organizing the populace like John Carter of Mars or Lawrence of Arabia).

Here's the thing, though.  To tackle this subject, we have to consider D&D magic — after all, Crusssdaddy already wrote a post about this on the Doomed World CARCOSA (and one for magic-users), so why am I doing it again?

Simple.  I really like the concept, but the magic works differently in my head.  Here's where I'm coming from.

(Also, as an aside, I might not keep these rules, but here's my current thought.)

Clerics

Clerics are fanatics and faithful who pray to the divine and are rewarded for their efforts.  That's really simplistic, but the bottom line is that clerics devote themselves to the divine, and so the divine devotes itself to clerics.  Whatever the particulars (some clerics pray to multiple deities while others only revere one), there's a give-and-take relationship present.

Clerics may not specifically pray for spells, but it's obvious their devotion grants them a pipeline to the gods.  In order for their magic to work, they have to maintain that open channel.

Carcosa interferes with this in two ways.

First, as noted in the Doomed World CARCOSA post, "The Old Ones dominate CARCOSA and the other Gods of the multiverse aren’t too keen on intruding."  I agree, although I'd also point out that Carcosa has a limited connection with the spirit world, suggesting the people are more familiar with corporeal things.  I'm inclined to keep the divine spell failure rules posited in that blog post: "Cleric spells have a base 50% chance of failure, modified downward by 5% per level of the caster (ex. a 3rd level Cleric has a 35% chance of failure, an 8th level Cleric has a 10% chance of failure, at 10th level and above the chance of failure is removed).  A failed spell counts as spent."

Second, as noted, "Praying for spells can be dangerous and calls to distant Gods are prone to attract unwelcome attention."  However, the some of the rules and comments in the article seem to imply that the Old Ones are divine and hold dominion over the gods.  In my head, as in Call of Cthulhu, they're not.  They're physical entities, and for all his power, Great Cthulhu with 57 HD is just a variation (albeit a weird variation) on a Fighting Man around level 57.  Power level has nothing to do with it; although the world's greatest boxer might be able to physically defeat the Grey God of Lightning and Tailors, one's a god and the other is not (although a Fighting Man at 57th level is hardly just a normal human anymore, either, he's not divine).

As such, casting cleric spells doesn't risk drawing the Old Ones' wrath.  However, it does draw their notice: a cleric must save vs. spells/magic at +2 or else have the expenditure of power be noticed by one of the Old Ones.  Within 1-10 days, the servitors of one of the Old Ones will arrive to investigate and likely kill the cleric.  Which Great Old One notices the expenditure of divine power (and subsequently sends servitors) is up to the DM, who is free to use the d10 chart on the above blog post.  Common sense may also apply — if you're in the middle of the desert, Cthulhu probably isn't going to send deep ones after you.

Unlike Crusssdaddy's post, I assume that turning only works on undead, and that spells tend to work the same, albeit with some Carcosa trappings.  Clerics seen casting spells are considered to be sorcerers, mutants, or stranger things, and so will be treated accordingly.

Magic-Users

Arcane Vancian magic is a strange animal, typically abstracted in D&D and its incarnations.  As D&D is implicitly post-apocalyptic (and some settings imply magic is modular and almost technological in its origin; see this Jeff's Gameblog post on sufficiently advanced magic for an example), magic is typically seen as a lost art.  Its heyday has passed, and only shadows of once-great power remain — Chaucer even writes about long-gone days of magic in The Wife of Bath's Tale, saying, "In th' olde dayes of the kyng arthour, / Of which that britons speken greet honour, / Al was this land fulfild of fayerye. / The elf-queene, with hir joly compaignye, / Daunced ful ofte in many a grene mede. / This was the olde opinion, as I rede; / I speke of manye hundred yeres ago. / But now kan no man se none elves mo."

-C at Hack & Slash recently tackled Vancian magic in his post, "On a Change in View."  As noted in the post, the best summation of Vancian magic is, "The design of this mosaic we cannot surmise; our knowledge is didactic, empirical, arbitrary."  Vancian magic is vague because even the wizards don't understand it — they merely understand how to access it.

But what if Vancian magic is vague not because it's dense but because it's unsafe?  Carcosa, pg. 111 states, "At the height of their powers, the Snake-Men destroyed themselves by releasing ultratelluric forces impossible to control."  What if that powerful ancient magic from the histories messes with the same fundamental forces as the Snake-Men's sorcery?  What if civilizations with powerful magic are rare (almost every D&D setting shows magic in decline) because they tend to destroy themselves — see the Doomsday argument and Fermi Paradox for real-world theories regarding the same problem.

Whatever the case, it is assumed that arcane magic taps into the fundamental forces of the cosmos without divine intercession.  The magus is the intercessor, and he has to deal whatever happens.

In Carcosa, that means he has to deal with the leftover energy from the Snake-Men's disaster.  Those ultratelluric forces are still available, and wreak havoc on the fabric of magic.  Unlike clerics, who become more adept at contacting their patrons from anywhere in the multiverse, this never gets easier for magic-users. Low-level magic-users cannot adequately prevent backlash, although they tend to throw less power around.  High-level magic-users become much better at preventing backlash, but channel more magical power.  The problems of control and efficiency effectively cancel each other out.

As such, whenever a magic-user casts an arcane spell, the player should roll a d20.  Nothing happens most of the time, but if he rolls a "1," the caster is struck by a backlash of cosmic force.  The DM should roll 1d10 and consult the following table:

1 - The magic-user is subject to unnatural aging, aging from 1-5 years instantly (roll on the Unnatural Aging chart).

2 - The magic-user takes 1 die of damage.

3 - The magic-user gains a random mutation.

4 - The spell fails, and the magic-user can cast no more spells that day.

5 - The magic-user acts randomly, as if affected by confusion.

6 - The magic-user goes insane as if struck by an insanity weapon.

7 - The magic-user loses a level, to a minimum of 0.

8 - The magic-user takes a number of dice of damage equal to the level of the spell.

9 - The magic-user summons a random creature.  The creature appears within the caster's line of sight, almost as if summoned by a summon monster spell.  This creature is not predisposed to like the caster and will likely attack.  The DM should determine such a creature by either rolling on a local encounter table or by generating a random Spawn of Shub-Niggurath.

10 - The spell goes awry, with twisted effects: attack spells hit allies, or even the caster; healing spells deal damage; protection spells grant vulnerabilities; and so forth.

Astute observers will note that incurring backlash does not necessarily cause the spell to fail.  Even if backlash kills the caster, he will cast the spell unless the particular backlash in question contradicts this claim.

Conversely, if the magic-user rolls a "20," something unexpected (but positive) should occur.  Roll 1d10 and consult the following table:

1-4 - The magic-user does not expend a spell slot by casting the spell.

5-7 - The spell's variable effects are maximized.

8-9 - The spell's effects (range, duration, damage, etc.) are doubled.

10 - Instead of the spell the magic-user intended to cast, the magic-user casts a random spell from the magic-user spell list.  This spell is always appropriately targeted — attacks hit enemies and protection spells target friends — but can otherwise be any spell from the list.  Yes, your Level 1 Magic-User might cast wish, although that's probably just more trouble than it's worth.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Carcosa Wacky Races

I doubt I'll find the time to participate, but you bet I'm interested.  This is for the FLAILSNAILS crowd.  Over-the-top Carcosa races.  Motorcycles that run on blood vs. battle vans that run on plutonium vs. dinosaurs that run on your opponents.

Read more, chump.  If I don't have time to jump onto Google+, at least I now have some low-prep option for when I'm down a player and/or drunk.  The charts are what make this entry.

So make sure you read it!

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

They Fight Crime!

E. M. Lamb's oft-mentioned The Misses (pictured here with Azathoth tattoo) brought They Fight Crime! to my attention.

It delivers exactly what it promises — two randomly-matched, idiosyncratic characters who fight crime.  Just the thing for random character concepts and unlikely team-ups.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

What Happened to You in Carcosa?

Weird Fantasy Role-Playing has, as some games do, a difference between city prices and rural prices.  In the rules, you can pick whichever set you want at character creation, because it's likely you picked up your gear in your travels.

However, since Carcosa predominantly describes rural environments, I've been toying with the idea of requiring a trip to the city of Carcosa in one's backstory if one wishes to use city prices.  So, without further ado:

What in the Hell Happened to You in Carcosa?

If you want to have journeyed to Carcosa before play starts, have your DM roll 1d30:

1 - You were infected by some mutagenic virus.  Start play with one random mutation.  Every day (typically upon awakening, reflecting something that happened to you while you slept), save vs. poison.  Failure indicates that you receive a random mutation (Carcosa, pg. 265, assuming the DM doesn't have his own mutation chart).

2 - While walking around the nearly abandoned streets of grim Carcosa, you found a sack of gold in some garbage.  You have an oversized sack of 2d20 × 10 gold pieces.  No, you don't get experience for it.

3 -  Maybe there was too much wine, or ale, or opium.  Or maybe you shouldn't have taken a hit of juice from the thorax of that thing that looked like somebody crudely spliced a gecko, a squirrel, a coral, and a praying mantis.  Whatever it was, that night put The Hangover to shame.  You begin play with no money or equipment, and roll for a carousing mishap on Jeff Rients' original table or Zak Smith's expanded table.  You get no experience for this round of carousing.  Roll 1d6; on a 5 or 6, you still have your own clothes.  On a 1, get a random mutation from whatever Spawn ichor you drank.

4 - You suffered a nasty wound taking weeks to recover, or maybe you suffered some form of wasting illness.  Lose ten ability score points at random (for each point lost, randomly determine the ability from which it is taken).

5 - You heard the word "Hastur" on the lips of some blank-eyed madmen in Carcosa, and it intrigues you.  Hastur...Hastur... you like the sound of it!

6 - You ran afoul of some Sorcerer or other, and you were cursed with aging.  Every day (typically upon awakening, reflecting something that happened to you while you slept), save vs. magic.  Failure indicates that you age as if you cast a sorcerous ritual; roll on the unnatural aging chart (Carcosa, pg. 14 or 267).

7 - A nameless troupe of pale dancers performed the most beautiful dance in Carcosa.  Since that time, you have been rendered unable to speak.  Don't forget to buy paper and ink.

8 - You found a Space Alien weapon (your DM should generate the size based on the tables in Carcosa, pg. 251-257).  Unfortunately, it was abandoned because somebody recognized it as flawed.  The first time you fire it, it explodes.  Determine how much energy is left in the power cell and express it as a percentage (so, a rifle with 36 charges remaining has 72% energy left).  The rifle explodes, dealing damage in a 30' radius like a grenade.  Assume the exploding filament and power cell deals the weapon's base damage for every full multiple of 10% power remaining, to a minimum of its base damage (so, that rifle with 72% energy remaining would deal 14 dice of damage in a 30' radius; a rifle with 24% remaining would deal 4 dice of damage; and a rifle with 8% remaining would deal 2 dice of damage).  If the weapon has a special property (such as being a gamma radiation weapon, or a sulfur weapon, or a logic weapon), it deals damage as that type of weapon.  It is possible to fix the weapon, but that's for the DM to adjudicate (maybe it requires a successful Tinker check, maybe it's a 1 in 10 chance like fixing a robot, or maybe you need to take it to an expert).

9 - Carcosa?  You've never been.  In fact, you cannot recall anything about your life before gameplay begins.  You just picked yourself out of the dirt with your current statistics and equipment.  What did you do that you cannot remember?

10 - Maybe there was too much wine, or ale, or opium.  Or maybe you shouldn't have taken a hit of juice from the thorax of that thing that looked like somebody crudely spliced a gecko, a squirrel, a coral, and a praying mantis.  Whatever it was, that night put The Hangover to shame.  If you're starting at first level, you begin play with no money or equipment and you need to roll a carousing mishap on Jeff Rients' original table or Zak Smith's expanded table.  You do, however, begin play with 1d12 × 250 experience points.  If you're above first level, use the carousing tables (again in Classic or Porn Star edition, depending upon your DM).  Your DM is well within his rights to say that you suffer a mishap even if the table says you shouldn't, because seriously, who gets drunk in the baroque city of Carcosa and expects to get away unscathed?

11 - You are the carrier of a mutagenic virus to which you are immune.  Anyone who spends more than 1-6 hours with you must save vs. poison or receive a random mutation (Carcosa, pg. 265, assuming the DM doesn't have his own mutation chart).

12 - Some jabbering madman on a street corner ranted at you.  If you're a Sorcerer, you know a random ritual.  If you're not a Sorcerer, you know (but cannot cast) a random ritual.  Somebody might pay you for that information, though.

13 - The nobles invited you to a grand feast, and the food was so invigorating.  You have a bonus +3 hit points per hit die.

14 - You found yourself in a strange labyrinth underneath the city.  You wandered for hours, eventually finding a bottle with your name on it.  When you opened it, it whispered a secret to you.  Your DM will tell you what it said; this could be an important campaign secret, or it could just be some horrible revelation that will only bring misery.  Bonus points if it's both.

15 - Every night you dream of Carcosa, and in your mind's eye, you return there.  Every morning, upon awakening, save vs. magic.  Failure indicates that you re-roll on this chart.  If you receive this result again, you do not have to save vs. magic the following day, although the dreams start again on the following day.

16 - You found a friendly robot or reprogrammed a deactivated one.  Your DM will randomly generate a robot (Carcosa, pg. 259-262) to be your faithful companion.

17 - Ever since your trip to Carcosa, you hear horrid whisperings in your mind.  Sometimes they tell you useful things, and sometimes they tell you awful things.  Sometimes they just tell you gibberish.

18 - You traded for a shiny new laser gun.  Begin play with a random piece from the armament tables (Carcosa, pg. 251-257).

19 - You found some weird thing that injected you with something that burned like the devil.  Every day (typically upon awakening, reflecting something that happened to you while you slept), save vs. poison with a +5 bonus to your roll.  Rolling a "1" is always a failure, no matter what your saving throws are.  Failure indicates that you have mutated into a random Spawn of Shub-Niggurath under the DM's control.

20 - When you awoke one morning, you found a pale mask sitting on your chest.  As long as you wear it while casting rituals, you never have to save vs. magic to avoid unnatural aging.

21 - Man, this water is quite a strange shade of jale.  Begin play with a random mutation (Carcosa, pg. 265, assuming the DM doesn't have his own mutation chart).

22 - You ran afoul of some grim and gaunt fanatic of some forgotten god, and now he hunts you.  You are being hunted by a Sorcerer of the DM's design, and the DM is encouraged to make him a tough opponent.  The sneaky little bastard is starting to wear on you, because he has this thing about letting you catch glimpses of him when he's stalking you; every time you see him, save vs. magic or flee in fear.

23 - You opened a door and some thing lashed out at whatever limb was through the doorway.  You are randomly missing a limb.  If it's a leg, you move at half speed.  If it's an arm, you can only hold one object at a time (no sword and shield), and cannot use two-handed weapons.

24 - You had an intriguing conversation with a lovely (and apparently sapient!) ulfire gem, and when you awoke in the morning, it was gone.  You're psionic (Carcosa, pg. 18-21).

25 - You tinkered with a robot, but when it activated, you apparently programmed it to destroy the first thing it saw.  Meaning you.  You are being pursued by a random robot (Carcosa, pg. 259-262).

26 - You were cursed to be outcast from your village.  Every day (typically upon awakening, reflecting something that happened to you while you slept), randomly determine your color.  You can use the charts in What Went Wrong, if you'd like, or you can just figure out some other way.  Random.org might be your friend if you're stuck.

27 - You gazed upon a monolith in Carcosa and blacked out.  When you awoke, you were back home.  Now, whenever you sleep, save vs. magical device or begin reciting the details of a random ritual.  You cannot benefit from this, but any Sorcerers who listen to your somniloquy can learn whatever ritual you are reciting that night.  If you're a Sorcerer, they can teach it to you if they so wish.  Non-Sorcerers will probably try to kill you for the nighttime blasphemies you speak.

28 - You returned from Carcosa subtly wrong, unable to interact with non-Carcosans.  When dealing with people and creatures not from the city of Carcosa, you are considered to have Charisma 3.  Maybe you rant in alien tongues, like some fantastical version of Tourette syndrome, or maybe your lean and hungry look puts people on edge.

29 - You saved somebody from a pack of things that strongly resembled spiders with Deinonychus heads, as envisioned by Ralph Steadman.  This fellow is now your loyal companion; s/he is two levels lower than you, to a minimum of 0 level.  Assume s/he has leather armor and a weapon.

30 - One of the bleak nobles of Carcosa thought your shabby clothes would be the latest fashion.  He traded your clothes (buy another set or you're naked) for a set of Space Alien battle armor.

(A Note on the City: In addition to Carcosa itself, some stuff on this chart makes oblique references to Call of Cthulhu, particularly Delta Green: Countdown, as well as the original work of Chambers and Bierce.)

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Random Tome

I just rolled on this random tome table, and now you're stuck with this:

28. A pornographic romance novel written in Dwarvish. If the PCs decide to read a page, they will find one of the passages found at This Site. [Rended Press]


Enjoy!

Monday, January 16, 2012

Awesome Posts I Missed

Here's the typical blogroll for you.

Role-Player Hater has been playing with The Random Esoteric Creature Generator.  Here are the Ingot Snakebeetles and the Squamous Fleshbear.  You're welcome.

Monsters and Manuals had a brief writeup of Utolso Varos, the last city on Earth.  I'm enamored of a campaign with only one human settlement in the midst of a vast wilderness, and since Clark Ashton Smith just had a birthday, it's totally appropriate.

Monsters and Manuals also gives us Project Gutenberg Appendix N, the Appendix N for a hypothetical game he'd like to run based entirely on public domain works.  John Carter, Baron Munchausen, and Doc Frankenstein?  Yeah, I'd play in that.

Hereticwerks gives us the Negamorph (Formless Spawn) for Terminal Space as part of their Mythos Future line.  Notable for giving a little a history of the literary development of the creature.

Along similar lines, Hereticwerks also gives a d30 chart of Lovecraftian backgrounds.  You know how Lovecraft's characters get weird inheritances or eldritch genealogies?  Yeah, this does that for your oD&D game.

You can bet that's getting used.

Monday, December 26, 2011

One Last Present: Secret Santicore!

Just a quick post for the moment.

Secret Santicore is live.  You should go download it.  Go to Giblet Blizzard and download it.

That is all.

(Shameless plug: you'll find this in it, so y'know.  Go look at it.)

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